Breaking the Ice: Getting to Know your Flatmates!

Tarini Tiwari 21 September 2021

Image courtesy of Unsplash (Myke Simon)

The time has come for freshers to move into their campus accommodation, and this is an understandably daunting thing to do. Meeting new people that you’re going to be living with for at least a year is terrifying, and it’s not easy to break the ice. Here are a few tips to make that initial period easier.

Buy a doorstop. This feels archaic, but it really works. Propping open your door tells your housemates that you’re willing to chat and welcomes them into your room. Equally, it helps set boundaries early—if you don’t have your door propped open, then people know you don’t want to be disturbed. If you’re in a house setting with a landing, keeping your door open can prompt chatting with your housemates while doing uni work, for example. In my first year I often did my readings with my door open while the others on my floor did the same thing, allowing us to talk intermittently while also being in our own spaces.

Freshers Week can be tiring to say the least. All the nights out, while fun especially after a year of lockdowns, aren’t the best way to get to know your housemates. Suggest getting a takeaway with your new neighbours and watching something on Netflix or playing some games. It’s a great way to bond with each other and the structure of a movie, series or game helps guide the conversation.

Image courtesy of Unsplash (Arthur Knoepflin)

Plan a trip together! Don’t worry, I’m not implying that you get a giant shared tent together and go camping. However, the Canterbury area boasts many activities you can do as a group. Get the bus to Whitstable, go shopping in town or explore the parks and countryside. Not only is it comforting to know that if you get lost, you’re lost as a group—I once accidentally went to Whitstable with my housemates when we were trying to go to town, and a possibly stressful situation became a funny story—but it also gives you a chance to learn more about the city and its surrounding areas.

Pick some freshers events to attend together. There are schedules available to see what’s on, and you can go to nights out, the Welcome Fair and various other events in order to explore more of the activities on campus while being in a group of people you know. This is also a way to go on nights out safely, as you’re all going back to the same place after and can walk home together!

Set rules about cleaning early on. It’s always awkward to see the bin overflowing and confront the guilty party, especially when there was never a system put into place. If you agree early on that people keep the space clean by wiping down the hobs and counters after cooking, hoovering once a week and taking the bins out when they’re full, you’ll avoid unsavoury conversations later and maintain the relationship with your housemates.

Image courtesy of Unsplash (Courtney Cook)

If someone in your house has friends over, make an effort to talk to them. It’s not only a chance to get to know new people, but it cements your friendship with your housemates as you’ve put in effort to make their friends feel welcome. It also means that you can now be a group of friends and plan activities together.

This seems cliché, but the most important thing is to be yourself. Especially after leaving school which can be quite stifling, uni is full of people who will appreciate your interests for what they are and share in them. Don’t sacrifice who you are just to make friends, because if they expect that of you then they were never meant to be your friend.